Thursday, April 4, 2013

Lord Fluffington Cuddlesworth III and the cats of Catatonia

As is the case in any story, there are more cast members than just the main protaginist. And so, in this way we step away temporarily from the mad artist Bruyn, to the distant continent of Catatonia.
The realm of the cat people, Catatonia was a continent constantly in turmoil. Politics were many and disputes fierce, yet very little was ever achieved as a strong sun ray could render all participants in a debate in a state of instant sleepiness.
Perhaps it was due to this lack of achievement, or perhaps it was due to the fact that no one ever took them seriously, that the cats of Catatonia were constantly plotting the demise of their neighbouring nations.
It was one of these great plotters that we now focus one. Lord Fluffington Cuddlesworth III was a very prominent noble within the houses of Catatonia and his temper knew no bounds. In fact now was one of those times when no scratching post was safe from his wrath!.
He had just finished up scratching up the arm of a nearby chair, for no other reason than that he could, when Fluffington managed to momentarily regain his composure and focus on the issue that had sent him into a rage in the first place.
Milk, a great delicacy in Catatonia and Fluffington's favourite beverage: the problem was it was either too cold or too luke warm. He wanted excitement in his milk. He had heard of the amazing things that could be done with this coffee substance and he wanted a similar treatment for his milk! Yes, frothed milk, heated by steam! It would be revolutionary and he would be the only noble in Catatonia with the secret to make it!!! There was however a small catch. He did not in fact know 'how' to make it.
"Get me my best agents!" he roared. "I have a task for them!".

Saturday, March 30, 2013

Life in the substation.

Life in the substation was good for the mad artist Bruyn.
There of course were always a few exceptions. He was still trying to resolve the coffee situation, currently building the Mk -II barista bot, and having sent some of his other steambots out to locate the world's greatest barista.
Then there were a few other annoyances. The contant hissing of pipes, the general dampness and humidity of a steam powered station, and the constant clanking of the boots of his many mechanical minions.
As for the noise he was going to retrofit his steambots with noise suppressing soles on their boots, and the noise of the pipes could be hidden under some pleasant music (note to self he thought - create a mechanical musician bot). The dampness would be a trickier issue but he felt confident he would resolve it.
In the meantime, it was back to the greatest emergency...the lack of good coffee.

Friday, March 29, 2013

A barista bot chosen and a decaffeinated diversion

Meela and Barry, had returned from the nearby township of Readership with plenty of feedback from the residents on what would be the most preferred and appropriate design for his new Barista Bot MK-II. It was an almost unanimous response to the top hat wearing option D.
The mad artist quite liked that, as he enjoyed a good top hat as much as the next person, and had personally thought Barry looked far more dapper since he was also retrofitted with a top hat.
The mad artist however was quite astounded by the amount of folks out there who didn't drink coffee! The shear revelation of this fact knocked him off his feet. He made himself a promise that he would embark on a pilgrimage (or in this case send one of his steam bots) to find the greatest coffee barista the world had ever known!!!
Meanwhile however, whilst perusing the feedback he had received from the residents of Readership, he was particularly amused by the suggested naming and blend recommendation offered by one resident. He decided to build one version of the option A barista bot for this lord, and fit it out with the suggested decaf making capabilites. He would send this Lord, the original pencil sketch of this decaf barista bot!

Thursday, March 28, 2013

The MK-II Barista Bot ?

The mad artist Bruyn could feel the madness growing in him. It was that special kind of madness you got when you had gone several days without a decent cup of coffee. That kind of madness that frayed at the edges of your sanity, removing thread by thread until you could get that delicious cup of caffeine fueled cacophany to vanquish it!
What makes a good Barista Bot, thought the mad artist? Java Script?
The simple fact that he was laughing maniacally at his own joke was reason enough to confirm that his sanity was waning. Besides, what was java script anyway. Surely only nerdy folks in the future would get the significance of this ridiculous pun?
He stared at the garble he had scribbled down upon the paper. Four designs it seemed. What would be the MK-II Barista bot? Not trusting his own objectivity, he sent Meela and Barry on a quest to the nearest pocket of civilisation, a very small town called Readership (weird name for a town if you ask me).
There they would get the feedback of the aspiring baristas and coffee connoiseurs. They would tell him which model to make! Of course!!!
And so, the puppy, Meela, and the former barista bot, Barry, ventured out on their quest to the nearby township of readship to ask the folk there a very serious question:
(Head on over to the Facebook page and cast your vote for the next Barista Bot design )

Tuesday, March 26, 2013

Barry and the big bad world

Whilst the mad artist Bruyn busied himself with the creation of a new coffee conjuring contraption, it was left to former barista bot , Barry and puppy, Meela to go and explore their surroundings.
Each walk they went on led them further into new territory, discovering areas of the old station that had not been touched upon in years. Eventually however their travels would lead them down the old train line to emerge out of the darkness of the mountain and into the world beyond.
Needless to say, the sky itself was almost enough stimulation to override Barry's sensors. The more world weary puppy, Meela, however, (well as world weary as a young puppy can be) was quick to push the boundaries of their surroundings, taking them further from home in each walk.
What perplexed Barry greatly was the puppy's sudden need to empty its bladder continually. Alas, he did not understand how one small puppy could hold so much liquid.  It would seem all this fresh air instilled an urge to purge one self's bodily functions. This thought was was confirmed soon after as a bird flying overhead seemed to decide Barrywas a suitable target and painted his shiny brass body with a dropped projectile of what looked like white paint.

Saturday, March 23, 2013

Barry the former barista gets a new role

Never one to baulk at adversity, the mad artist Bruyn saw the failure of the first generation barista bot as a new challenge. After all, not everyone can make a good coffee (in the future airport cafes will be testament to this!).
An so the former MK-I barista bot, now named Barry, was to get a new role. Noticing how well the puppy, Meela had taken to being entertained by the Barry bot, the mad artist decided to do some modifications. To the best of his understanding, young puppies needed exercise, and due to the mad artist's aversion to all things physical, he decided to retrofit Barry with a few new modifcations.
Removing the brewing systems (no need for them), he sealed up the torso and attached two arms. One to hold a leash and the other a device, he would cleverly dub "The pooper shovel" (he would have preferred a word that rhymed with pooper but couldn't think of one).
Then to integrate Barry more into society when walking Meela, he gave him a very fetching moustache and top hat. Barry had transformed into the very epitamy of a dog walking gentlemen.
And now with some time to think (with Barry and Meela from out under his feet for a while) the mad artist was able to get back to addressing the most important matter: how he would get a constant supply of good coffee without having to send out for it all the time.

Friday, March 22, 2013

Barista Bot MK-I

The mad artist Bruyn was never one to conform to traditional victorian conventions. Whilst tea was the drink of choice of the era, he in fact desired nothing more than a good latte or capuccino (Yes of course they were available in victorian times, this is obviously an alternate universe!)
Because he himself could not make a good coffee., He decided to build a bot that could make one for him, and so the Barista Bot MK-1 was born.
Unfortunately however, if you cannot make a good coffee yourself, then chances are you cannot make a steambot who will make you a good coffee for you. The first barista bot was an unparalleled failure. Its coffees were too watery and the milk was frothed far too much. Obviously a side effect of too much steam!
On the plus side however, MK-1, who the mad artist named Barry, was able to do quite a good job of entertaining the extremely needy Meela. It seemed that the little puppy had taken quite a liking to the rather comical barista bot and chased him around the substation.
The mad artist however did make a note to retrofit a few of his lamp bots with emergency fire extinguishers as Barry and Meela's antics were prone to cause the odd accident from time to time.

The Puppy: Me! Me! Meela!

The mad artist Bruyn was furiously scribbling over his drawing board, designing modifications for his newly made flying lamp bots when he heard a crying from the recesses of the substation.
Irritably coming to the realisation that he had not yet designed a steambot to investigate annoying noises he instead interrupted his illustrative furor to find the source.
What he did discover was a small puppy than must have fallen down a drain somewhere and landed in the substation. The puppy had injured itself in the fall and couldn't walk properly.
Staring analytically into those large innocent eyes, something must have activated a cog in the artist's clockwork heart.
And so he begun to design a mechanical leg brace to help the injured puppy walk. Was this the start of a beautiful friendship?
All the mad artist knew was this puppy followed him everywhere. It was so needy.wanting attention every second, hence he would name the dog Meela (with the emphasis on Me!)

Thursday, March 21, 2013

Takeaway Techbots

Living in the heart of the mountain in the dingy confines had done nothing to improve the mad artist Bruyn's social skills. In fact with each passing day his desire for sunlight and human interaction became less and less. Why search out people when he could make his own clockwork companions who would never argue, never contradict and never judge. These mechanised folks would pander to his every whim with a unquestionable emotionless dedication.
But this left him still with a dilemna. And that dilemna was his love of takeway food. Yes that's right, dirigible drive thru was big business in alternate victorian times and the mad artist Bruyn ceratinly did not want to miss out on his value meal deals.
And so another mechanised solution was formed. The Takeaway Techbots joined the rank of his every expanding steam powered army of minions. Their job would to be to go out and fly over hill and dale to find the mad artist's favourite takeaway foods and bring them back to him. With their radical flight capabilities they were also programmed and modified to be efficient queue jumpers.
After all, a hungry mad artist, was an angry mad artist (and having angry and mad in one's title was certainly too extreme and could not be tolerated!)

The Janitor Bots

The success of his steambot minions had embodied the mad artist Bruyn with a desire to create more of the mechanised wonders to assist with the day to day maintenance of the substation and so the janitor bots came into life. Working non stop without complaint.